seftiri (seftiri) wrote,


Read This First

You fucking bastard Dear Neal Baer,

My fucking eyes are bleeding It has come to my attention that a goddess you should not even be allowed to be in the same room with Jeri Ryan will be prostituting herself by deigning to agree to be on your execrable show guest-starring on three episodes of SVU. You must stay up nights inventing new ways to piss me off be so happy to have talent such as hers to butcher gracing your hour a week of goat-fucking mediocrity show.

This casting choice blinds me with murderous rage thrills me no end because I am Jeri Ryan's bitch I have missed Ms. Ryan's presence on the small screen and now I have to watch-Goddammit! I look forward to any time she shares her talent with us.

The fact that it must be on your hellishly farcical excuse for a masturbatory fantasy show makes me want to stick a burning fork in my eyes is regrettable but I will attempt not to projectile vomit uncontrollably endure.

Do not even THINK about putting her on the show full-time make a habit of inconveniencing me in this way, however. Even though I am still Jeri Ryan's bitch agreeing to watch, I'm not even remotely able to express how much I loathe you right now reserving my judgment of these episodes.

I'd like to give you a Clorox enema Have a nice day,

Still Jeri Ryan's bitch DiNovia

Tags: jeri ryan news, rant, svu

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