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01 October 2005 @ 12:53 am
Review, "Design", 9/27/05  
Ah, here it is. The long awaited review of "Design".

Episode summary:

1st part of a 2-part crossover with "Law & Order" mothership. Clearly, this episode was intended to be the season premiere. You can tell by how much it didn't suck rocks.

While talking a pregnant rape victim off a ledge, Olivia finds herself drawn to assist this woman who seems so in need. Through a harrowing investigation and several moments of SEVERE bad acting on the part of non-actors who should never be allowed to speak on screen in the guise of a "role" ever again, I don't care WHO they're married to, Olivia discovers that the "rape victim" and her mother, Wonder Woman, are devious con-artists who will stop at nothing to get what they want. Even if it means the life of a newborn.

DiNovia's content commentary:

Clearly, this episode was intended to be the season premiere. It had all the bells and whistles. Not to mention, the entire cast. Whoever had the bright idea to start season 7 with "Demons" should be fired. Or at least forced to watch "The Littlest Groom" for a week, non-stop.

I think that the plot was well executed if a little predictable at moments, particularly with respect to Olivia's initial reaction to April. Once the writers/directors stopped with the flashing "I AM A CHILD OF RAPE TOO" neon sign over Olivia's head, it became a fairly interesting episode.

Was it just me, though? Did anyone else feel that the characterization of April was a little scattered? She's a victim. She's a con-artist. She's cold as ice. She's a victim of her upbringing. She's completely insane. She's in control. She's controlled by her mother. She's the mastermind. She's the pawn. ::headspinning:: Could we just pick one or two of those, please? Otherwise, she's the tilt-a-whirl perp and she gives us a headache just trying to keep up!

I liked how everyone was thinking it but no one came right out and said "Olivia, do you think you are so involved with this particular case because YOU ARE THE CHILD OF RAPE?" I guess no one really had to say it outloud since it was blinking on and off above her head like a cheap Vacancy sign.

Did anyone else see the arrows pointing to the infant in the scene where Olivia holds the little one after the docs clear her? There seemed to be a flashing message that said "Coming soon to an Olivia near you." Was that just me too?

Confidential to the writers: ENOUGH ALREADY. Casey Novak is a highly competent lawyer. STOP MAKING HER LOOK LIKE A TOTAL FLAKE. This is the writers' fault. I don't know if they have it in for the character or what but Jesus, let her win a few cases this season, okay? At this rate, Arthur Branch is going to have to fire her and re-hire Serena Southerlyn. AND I WILL NOT TOLERATE SVU WITHOUT CASEY NOVAK.

DiNovia's Other Comments:

Casey! In Goliath!Purple! My cup runneth over and over and over. She looked great! Not at all as blonde as we were led to expect. THANK ALL THAT'S HOLY.

Casey had some of the best lines, as always. And the eye-shagging was LOVE ITSELF. (If you're a C/O-yay shipper, like me, that is.)

Olivia's hair was better! Didn't like the little flippy do, but she didn't look like an aging drag queen this episode. Thank GOD.

That being said, I'd like to ask the show's producers to either order the angel choir sound effect to play whenever Olivia is on screen or to stop with the Mother Olivia, Rescuer of the Fallen plots. Can she go back to being a cop sometime soon? Kthx.

Lynda Carter was perfect in the role of Lorraine Dillon. She should do evil more often. Except the looking like my aunt part. That made it all too personal and creepy. O_o

Aside to Casting Director: When the role calls for a line that states "I'm too beautiful for prison", it's probably best that you acquire an actress who doesn't look like she has an unfortunate addiction to collagen injections in one one-inch section of her upper lip. Instead of looking "too beautiful" for prison, she looked too "what the Hell is that?!" I don't think that is the look you were probably wanting.

Aside to Casting Director II, the Sequel: I don't care WHO that asshat is married to, NEVER LET HIM ACT AGAIN. That was excruciating. You should be ashamed of yourself. Unless, of course, you were hoping to embarrass the troll and ridicule him. In which case, good job. Keep up the good work.

Everybody watch the bouncing baby girl. As she goes from Lorraine's hands to Olivia's. Then to Olivia's. Then back to Olivia's. Then to Olivia's again. Then finally to her daddy's, while Olivia looks on, glaring daggers at the man. Yeah. Got the point. Point gotten. Thanks for sharing. Got it, thanks. No, really. I mean it. We get it. We understand--we see wha--OKAY OKAY!! OLIVIA WANTS A FUCKING BABY! WE FUCKING GET IT! SHUT UP ALREADY!! Jesus.

DiNovia's Rating:

3 Limes



PS: Indepth of "Flaw" to follow sometime before Tuesday.
My State of Mind: optimisticoptimistic
shayshaych_03 on October 1st, 2005 06:18 am (UTC)
*falls out of couch, laughing*

oh. yeah, well okay. damn. too funny. yes, we certainly "get" it about liv.


the COYAY i mean. can you stand it? eyeshagging, glance cutting and... emotional overlays.

it's looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove.


the squeeness is rampant.

plus. wonderwoman omg Lynda Carter. my first.crush.ever.

followed by lindsey wagner and jacklyn smith, but hey. yummage.

she's still hot.

but her onscreen daughter, is not. oh no no. those were not the lips of luscious kissage. collagen or whatever, it was... not attractive.

so anyway... can't wait to see your review of the sequel, "Olivia!Gets!Revenge!" or maybe, "Borgia!in!Court!"
seftiri: All Smilesseftiri on October 1st, 2005 06:31 am (UTC)
Ohh yeah, the eye-shagging et al was perfection for us C/O-yay-ers. (We really need a word for this that encompasses both characters, i.e. something that goes beyond the word "lime".)

And don't worry, I will have PLENTY to say about Borgia!In!Court!


Glad I made you laugh!

And wow. Your list went Lynda Carter, Lindsay Wagner, Jaclyn Smith.

Mine went Karen Valentine, Lindsay Wagner, Lynda Carter, Kate Jackson, Cheryl Ladd, Jaclyn Smith. In that order.

Duality strikes again!
shayshaych_03 on October 1st, 2005 08:35 am (UTC)
i thought we already had copper n steel... aka CNSers? or is that too vague?

i should say i would add Erin Grey to that list as well. :D
(Deleted comment)
seftiri: One Girl Armyseftiri on October 1st, 2005 02:11 pm (UTC)
Awkward is a good description for it.

Thanks, by the way! I'm glad you enjoyed my little review. I find I'm having great fun doing these.

deify_bd_wong on October 1st, 2005 06:39 pm (UTC)

...oh, I just stated the nauseatingly obvious? Sorry about that.
seftiri: Liz Lay Her Downseftiri on October 1st, 2005 07:25 pm (UTC)
LOL. It's okay, dear. You should hear what I shout at the TV during these episodes. LOL
Kathryn Erbe's biggest fan: SVU Casey /happyaudragoren on October 2nd, 2005 04:12 am (UTC)
You are the greatest,you never fail to make me laugh.
seftiri: Diane @ Habitat4Humanityseftiri on October 2nd, 2005 04:45 am (UTC)
That's my job! Didn't you know? ;)

Glad you liked it.